Dirty Pick Up Lines
Yo Mama Jokes
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A man walks up to a waitress.
The waitress says" I'lll get you a table."
The man says, " I came to buy food, not a table!"
Two waiters go to their credit union on their lunch break, when armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the waiters, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables. While this is going on, the first waiter jams something in the other waiters hand. Without looking down, the other waiter whispers, "What is this?" to which the first waiter replies, "It's your share of the tips from that party of 12."
An American tourist went into a restaurant in a Spanish provincial city for dinner, and asked to be served the specialty of the house. When the dish arrived, he asked what kind of meat it contained.
"Senor, these are the cojones," the waitress replied.
"The what, you say?" exclaimed the tourist.
"They are the testicles of the bull killed in the ring today," explained the waitress.
The tourist gulped but tasted the dish anyway, and found it delicious. Returning the following evening, he asked for the same dish. After he finished the meal, the tourist commented to the waitress: "Today's cojones are much saltier and smaller than the ones I had yesterday."
"True, senor," agreed the waitress. "You see the bull, he does not always lose."
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