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  • Assorted Jokes
     Famous Athletes Quotes

    Joke info
    Date: 2003-03-22
    By: thedirty

    Rating: 
     3.0 out of 5 (42 votes)
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  • Posted By?:
    4Q2

  • The Joke:
    *Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan all them kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan all the kids to copulate me."

    *New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."

    *Upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the Redskins say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."

    *Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings."

    *Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann, 1996: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

    *Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."

    *Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height" also "You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."

    *Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up again with promoter Don King: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton."

    *Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."

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